Roo Days

I’m sitting on my bed, listening to Roo. He’s supposed to be the shower – he’s actually been up here for 25 minutes supposed to be showering – but, instead, he’s in the bathroom with the door closed, talking trash.

The morning started well but Noodle and Roo would turn the volume dial up every ten minutes or so. Boogie is still sleeping (he’s my favorite today) so they were asked repeatedly to keep their voices down. Couldn’t do it, mama. So Roo was sent upstairs to shower and get dressed for the day with Noodle to follow afterwards. The boys both hate showers and I hate stinky children, so this is a punishment that serves double duty for me.

After 20 minutes and still not hearing the water running, I came up to find Roo still in pajamas and full of excuses. More conversation, more consequences. And off Roo stomps to the bathroom. The child was born without an inside voice, so he’s incapable of muttering. The whole house and probably our neighbors know that HE IS HAVING A BAD DAY and HE DIDN’T WANT TO HAVE A BAD DAY BUT EVERYONE KEEPS MAKING HIS DAY BAD and WHY WOULD PEOPLE TREAT HIM LIKE THIS? HE JUST WANTED TO STAY IN PAJAMAS TODAY!

I don’t have a measuring cup small enough for the amount of crap that I give about Roo’s perception of inequality. Literally, I could not care less. Go wash your butt and maybe brush your teeth while you’re at it.

I have definitely had Roo Days. There are mornings you just don’t wanna wake up, everything feels too hard and the world is out to get you. And the truth is, most people could not care less because they’re too busy with their own Roo Day. It happens and I get it. But allow me to suggest that, should you find yourself in the middle of Roo Day today, you find your inside voice and don’t shout to the neighborhood that YOU HAVE NOW WASHED YOUR BUTT LIKE YOU WERE TOLD? Maybe listen to a little Enya and breathe deeply. Make yourself a latte. And probably close the windows – the neighbors will thank you.