Reloaded!

It’s Friday as well as the 977th teacher in-service day of the school year. I’ve got my bonus baby today, so it’s a six child, no-holds-barred fun fest up in Casa Bradshay. Melissa was supposed to bring me coffee on her lunchbreak and she forgot, then she got to escape back to the office after 45 minutes. A good wife would not have whined about either, but I’m betting you already know I forfeited that trophy a long time ago.

The boys are outside in the semi-dusk playing with a laser tag set that my parents got them for their birthday. They asked if I wanted to play (spoiler alert: I do not) but I convinced them that they really should play with just the two of them to figure out how it works. CLEARLY, MY BRILLIANCE IS NOT GENETICALLY INHERITED.

Every time the sensor is hit five times, the gun runs out of ammo and has to be reloaded. This isn’t hard – it’s a laser gun, after all, and reloading means holding down the trigger for two seconds until a really deep dude-ish voice shouts RELOADED! From in the house, that deep dude’s voice is all I can hear. If only reloading my own energy were as simple.

I started a new medication for my kidneys yesterday and I have spent the day in a fog. The doctor said it’d take a few weeks to acclimate, but I really hope she was exaggerating because I feel like an extra from the set of the Thriller video. Even my teeth feel tired. My kids let me nap with the baby this afternoon while Pook and Boogie were asleep and it was soooooo nice. And I still feel like a zombie, but now I look the part, too.

Melissa came home from work with coffee in hand and I would be lying if I said that the deep dude-ish voice in my head didn’t shoot RELOADED! at the sight of that beautiful Starbucks cup. I’m chugging this puppy like it’s water in the desert, because believe me, it is. These are the days of caffeine, mini-naps and leggings as pants.

Side note: a spouse who brings you coffee is my definition of marrying up. A spouse who lets you sleep in while they kid wrangle AND brings you coffee AND makes you waffle cakes is marrying up so far you need an elevator.